I'm going to use this space for writing or rewriting some of the topics discussed on my family blog. I plan to archive stories and  I would love for family and friends to join me. Just let me know and I'll send you an invite. It's easy. Right now I'm adding new pages for each story.  My family will moan when they read the story below because it's been told so often, but now it is in writing.

Modeling

As I watched my three year old daughter playing in her Fisher Price kitchen I thought, how adorable! She was tending to the pots on the little stove, stirring and fussing as if she were a chef in a five-star restaurant. And then she put her hands on her hips, stomped her foot, and yelled DAMN IT, I’ve burned it again!

Hmm, wonder where she learned that?

I am a famous cook, although my fame isn’t necessarily the type that most would seek. I invented pork chips, beef chips, and chicken chips (pieces of meat burned into unrecognizable patties which can chip enamel off teeth). Recently I burnt brussel sprouts that actually melted into the pot, leaving permanent black indentations. Have you ever smelled burning brussels sprouts?  The cruciferous malodor clings to fabrics, walls and ceilings and is unaffected by all attempts of removal. The stench became embedded in my nasal membranes, traveling with me when I sought refuge out of doors.There was no escape.

I think I will become a better cook when I build a computer station in my kitchen. Currently the smoke has to fill two rooms before reaching my nose in the office.  Being an inattentive cook isn't all bad: my children know when the smoke alarm goes off that our meal is served.